In just Ten years , there have been 11 precious cherubs flown straight from Heaven into our lives. Back when I was giving cancer a run for its money…. I remember wondering if I would live to see the first grandchild Benjamin born, and some days i was so sick and so exhausted I could have “surrenderd all” and not cared to even stay here and fight. That was a long year of doctoring and not having dreams in my life. I just tried to get from one appt to the next. I stopped dreaming or thinking about tomorrow, or next week, or next month. Things I wanted to accomplish. I just functioned from apt to appt.
Now OUR Baby is carrying perhaps our last grandbaby…and it has been a precious journey .
To be able to share in OUR children’s lives, to see them today all grown up, what they have all became ( super, great, kind, loving, Hard working, honest , people) to be able to share in the lives of their babies each and every day is a BLESSING far beyond what I may have earned or deserved, and more precious than words can say.
(And to think this all began in our 10th grade English class in 1978. I ask the guy behind me, for a pencil. Doesn’t seem possible that was 37 years ago that we first met.
Today is a milestone of sorts I reckon. At 12:25 p.m. I will officially be 53 years young. Like all birthday receipts the first thing we must do is acknowledge gratefulness that we are alive and well. Then we count our many many blessings. Then of course we run down the same old road of “Where has the time gone” which is the cross street to “How can I be this old” and we end up at “Golly I wish time would slow down some”.
It has been a beautiful life. I loved and cherished my babies from day one. I never missed a moment of their lives. Walking, talking, teething, school, graduation, marriage, babies, I am so thankful that I have been able to be with them through all the steps. We lived awfully poor in order to do that but it is a decision I would do all over again. Our last baby was a twin. They were fraternal. It was a blessing they each had their own protective sack, as the other twin died in uterine and almost caused great sickness to the surviving baby. An emergency C Section was ordered. A week before I turned twenty four I had carried four babies and delivered three. We had Tonya Suzanne at age 20, Thomas Haas, at 22, and Catherine Marie at 23.
I have known some beautiful people in my time, and at my age I can fairly judge that these select few are in fact a rare and precious breed. The man I bought this farm from 21 years ago, loved me like they say Jesus loves us. No requirements, nothing I did to earn it , nothing I could do to repay all the unconditional love and kindness. We were not related by blood, but drawn to one another’s spirit like a moth to a flame.
Never a sunset that I don’t think of Burton and appreciate the life HE made possible for me on this farm. The life He gave to my children and to their children. Having no children of his own, but knowing the good life it would bring he offered to sell me his farm on a land contract so I could make yearly payments at the end of each harvest. I am still making payments and I totally believe that anything worth having is worth working for and getting it the honest way. His friendship was a life gift for me and I still miss him terribly everyday. I Still want to run tell him some fun news, great news, show him new photos I took, share a couple pots of coffee with him, and talk the day away like we used to. Thirty seven years my senior…..but you could never see or hear the age difference when we were visiting .
At 53, I feel young inside, but I think I look my age. The wrinkles are there when I laugh and probably when I don’t. The hair is graying though I try to mix it in with highlights, and gravity …well its no friend to anyone.
But I am thankful that I am still here, that I have been blessed with my children and their children. I have had a few “real friends” and with harvest time beating down on my neck today I thank the Lord above that He has chosen to keep me on this farm/ranch one more year. To see the animals grow, to see all the new babies born in the barns, to pick corn with my old Oliver ear picker and watch it fall into a gravity wagon, and see all the help I have from our children, in laws, and grandchildren unloading the wagons of corn. All those gorgeous yellow ears of corn going up the elevator and into the round wire crib….why I would swear this is HEAVEN on Earth right here in my own back yard.